Lindsay Lohan’s jail sentence may be mercifully brief, but that doesn’t mean she’s not suffering horribly. Among other indignities, the starlet has been forced to wear an orange jumpsuit and — brace yourself — “granny panties.” Oh, the humanity!

According to In Touch magazine, the undies in question come one-size-fits-all, and skinny LiLo has to knot them at the sides to keep them up.

Adjusting to prison life hasn’t been easy for La Linds: “She’s been crying all day long and is a total mess,” a source said. “She’s now in a catatonic, out-of-it calm.”

And it’s a good thing she’s being kept out of the general prison population, considering that “lots of girls in here would love to clock her, just to be known as ‘the girl who decked Lindsay,” the source said. “She’d better watch herself.”

Luckily, her ordeal won’t last much longer. Lindsay has reportedly put her hair and makeup team on standby for a possible release this weekend. Whew!

Love’s New Love

Stop the presses: Jennifer Love Hewitt has a new boyfriend. The in-love-with-love actress is dating actor-director Alex Beh, Us magazine reported.

“She’s so into him,” a friend of the “Ghost Whisperer” star said.

After splitting up with co-star Jamie Kennedy, J.Love had most recently been linked to Jenny McCarthy’s ex, actor John Asher.

“It’s relatively new,” the pal said of the romance. “But they’re really cute together.” On July 18 at L.A. eatery Katsuya, “they were holding hands the whole night!”

What do you say we give it, oh, six months?

Cry for Help

Here’s the latest stream of news from the unstoppable torrent of ugly revelations that is the Mel Gibson scandal.

After making public a photo of Oksana Grigorieva’s bruised face, allegedly taken after the actor assaulted her, Radar Online reported that he had left her 30 “terrorizing” voice mails following the incident. And, in a development that could greatly bolster Oksana’s case against the “Braveheart” star, the website reported that she secretly sent her attorney an e-mail after the traumatic incident.

“He hit me in the face with a fist and broke two of my front teeth, as well as he was choking me with his elbow and squishing my face down with the palm of his hand,” the Russian musician wrote hours after the alleged January incident, adding, “He even hit Lucia,” the couple’s baby daughter.

“He went completely violent while I was holding our two-month-old baby crying in my arms,” Oksana, who’s also a mom to son Sascha, 12, wrote. “I’m asking for your help. I don’t know what to do right now. The scariest thing is the safety of my children.”

The e-mail could stand as important evidence, since questions about why Oksana didn’t report the incident to police immediately after it occurred could cast doubt on the credibility of her story. Mel’s camp has claimed she made up the tale of assault and is trying to milk him for money.

Kitty Raymond is an entertainment writer and astrologer. She welcomes feedback at