Although the tabloids would love us to believe that Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt are perpetually on the verge of a breakup, the actress insists nothing could be further from the truth. In fact, she says they’re madly in love.

“The children certainly tie us together, but a relationship won’t hold if it’s only about the kids,” the “Salt” star tells Parade magazine. “You also must be really interested in each other and have a really, really wonderful, exciting time together. We do. Brad and I love being together. We enjoy it. We need it, and we always find that special time. We stay connected. We talk about it. It’s very important.

“There’s never a period when Brad and I are pulled apart. We are not separated for more than three days, ever. We stay really connected. We actually don’t go out much. It’s funny. We’re very homebound. We’re very much mommy and daddy in our pajamas.”

The Oscar winner goes on to say, “I feel sad for someone who has never known love. Love elevates.”

All right, all right. You don’t have to rub it in!

Vienna: Liar and Cheater?

The guy accused of canoodling with Vienna Girardi — while the “Bachelor” winner was still engaged to Jake Pavelka — has come forward to say that her denials are lies. What’s more, she lied to him about the status of her reality-show romance.

After Vienna insisted on the intensely emotional reunion special that “nothing” happened between her and actor Gregory Michael at a June event where they were seen getting close, the “Greek” star was quick to refute her claims.

“That’s a lie,” Gregory tells Us magazine. “We definitely made out that weekend, and Vienna made it very clear that it was over between her and Jake.”

Though Jake confronted Vienna by saying, Gregory “told me you cheated,” Gregory clarified, “I never said she cheated. I said we hooked up and she said they were broken up. I would never do that if she was in a relationship.”

This whole “Bachelor” he-said-she-said-and-the-other-guy-said drama is really getting ridiculous. At this point, it’s not even a question of whose word we believe, but who we distrust the least.

Fingers Doing the Talking

Granted, the prosecutor’s case against Lindsay Lohan was pretty compelling. But Judge Marsha Revel might have imposed an even harsher sentence on the jail-bound starlet if she spotted a certain telltale sign of LiLo’s contempt for the courthouse proceedings.

Eagle-eyed viewers spotted a message on each of La Linds’ middle fingernails, camouflaged in a psychedelic-colored nail polish design, that read “[Expletive] U.”

This from a woman who pleaded for mercy before the judge before her 90-day sentence was handed down, insisting, “I’m not taking this as a joke. This is my life.”

After breaking down in tears, she said, “It’s just been such a long haul and I don’t want you to think that I don’t respect you.”

We weren’t sure whether Lindsay’s tearful speech to the judge was an all an act because, well, we’d kind of forgotten she can actually act. But we’re thinking her nails were the last nail in the coffin of her credibility. 

Kitty Raymond is an entertainment writer and astrologer. She welcomes feedback at