If anyone, first lady Michelle Obama certainly has it "all." Family, friends, power, beauty, staff--and her husband is the president.

But, she tells iVillage, women probably can't have it all. The reason: The "all" changes all of the time.

Instead, women should look at what they need and and be satisfied.

In an engaging interview that touched on life inside the White House, Obama told iVillage, an online women's site, "My message to women is: Be open. Give yourself a break. Stop thinking that there is an answer to that question, 'Can women have it all?' Just live your life and figure out what's in your heart and what you need. And that will change every year, and you've got to be okay with that."

She also walked around another hot-button topic in the interview, whether she has read the hugely popular erotic book "50 Shades of Grey." Her answer: She's too busy to read.

Obama said, "You know, you can't live in this society without hearing about Fifty Shades of Grey. Everybody has heard about that book, including me. Neither of us have read it, because I haven't had time to read anything. But I have a lot of friends, staff, people who are reading it, so it's all around."