The folks over at Gawker discovered this gem, posted on the D.C. Craigslist on Saturday. Apparently a "friendly syndicated columnist," living in the Chinatown/Penn Quarter neighborhood is looking for an assistant to do, well, everything for them. The job ad says the columnist is looking for someone who could be a personal trainer, a wardrobe, make-up and hair stylist, an interior designer, a business planner, a yard worker, an interview transcriber, a mentor to the columnist's daughter (an undergraduate at Georgetown), a ballroom dance instructor and an auto mechanic, among other qualifications. The compensation is listed as $15 an hour. If you think you know who this "columnist" is, leave your guesses in the comments section.